May 2013
This time tomorrow I’ll be somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean, and this time tomorrow plus five hours I’ll be in DC. When I finish packing, that’s the end of the Ukrainian adventure this year. If I weren’t so tired, I would be so sad.
So I’m thinking of what I’m looking forward to most about coming home, and this is what I’ve got so far:
drinkable tap...
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"Topography," Sharon Olds
punch-in-the-face-poetry:
After we flew across the country we got in bed, laid our bodies delicately together, like maps laid face to face, East to West, my San Francisco against your New York, your Fire Island against my Sonoma, my New Orleans deep in your Texas, your Idaho bright on my Great Lakes, my Kansas burning against your Kansas your Kansas burning against my Kansas, your...
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Today I learned that I have an inappropriate number of feelings about Damien Hirst.
Anyway, he sucks.
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motivatedslacker replied to your post: Ukraine, why do you allow parking on the sidewalks…
I think a lot of US mannequins have nipples too, actually. Which I’ve also found weird.
It’s so weird! Even weirder than mannequin belly buttons, which…you aren’t fooling anyone, mannequins. You are not mammals.
Ukraine, why do you allow parking on the sidewalks and why do your mannequins have nipples? Please reply.
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every-sound replied to your photo: Today I got photo-bombed by a wedding party in…
what is that thing next to you
bpkathleen replied to your photo: Today I got photo-bombed by a wedding party in…
looks like a hive of Easter eggs
What bpkathleen said. It’s a piece by Ukrainian artist Oksana Mas, who also did this super-cool sculpture of the Virgin Mary, also with eggs.
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I realized just now that my “if I spoke russian i don’t think i’d ever come back” tag could be misinterpreted.
If I spoke better Russian, I don’t think I’d ever come back to America. (She says, joking but also not joking.)
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bpkathleen replied to your post: Potential memoir titles
Also: It is Ukraine, not “the Ukraine.” (Right? I’m not sure, but “the” sounds weird.)
That’s right! “The Ukraine” is more accurate for a region, but it’s an independent country now.
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Potential memoir titles
Why Are You Parking On The Sidewalk: General Anxiety Disorder, Ukraine, and Me
Sorry You Had To Repeat That Three Times: I Dropped Russian After Two Semesters, And Other Regrets
Everything Hurts But Mostly My Legs: A Travelogue
Don’t Drink The Water, Like, No, Literally Don’t Drink The Water (And Other Good Advice)
I Guess We Live In The Choir Loft Now: Misadventures in Touring Old...
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Things I apparently collect now
Stuffed hedgehogs
Various editions of Everything Is Illuminated
There’s something weird about ordering an iPad online when you’re temporarily living up the street from a large statue of Lenin.
In other news, I am a capitalist pig.
“The agenda. Okay. So the Wax Museum, the Museum of Toys, and the Museum of Guys...”
– Mama is excited about historical weaponry.
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Unsurprising museums my family has suggested
The Museum of Literature
The Museum of Bread
The Museum of Toys
The Museum of Outstanding Figures (four writers)
The Museum of Wax Figures
We ruled out:
The Museum of Water
Also to be visited, and also unsurprising:
the Hedgehog in the Fog statue
the State Puppet Theater
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In the last 27 hours I’ve traveled 5,000 miles (Dulles -> Paris, Paris -> Kiev) which took about ten hours of flight time altogether, during which I basically could not move my legs because I got the window seat and am just shy of 5’8”. I think I slept for maybe twenty minutes.
My parents and I are so tired that we can barely form sentences. But we’re here!
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someauthorgirl replied to your post: I’m going to Kiev for two weeks tomorrow (no time…
Have fun! Take pictures so I can oooooh at them!
I will take so many photos, you won’t even know what to do with yourself. GET PSYCHED.
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aka14kgold replied to your post: I’m going to Kiev for two weeks tomorrow (no time…
Bon voyage! I hope you have a great time and that there are no travel mishaps and everything is wonderful :)
Thank you, love!! I will return with stories of all sorts, and I’ll miss you a ton.
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shesarejector replied to your post: I’m going to Kiev for two weeks tomorrow (no time…
you’re so cool.
You’re so hot you’re making me sexist.
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I’m going to Kiev for two weeks tomorrow (no time like the present to mention that!), so I’m going to be mighty scarce around these parts until the 26th.
Please think all your best not-losing-the-luggage thoughts at me?
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velocipedestrienne:
I just feel like you should all know that mysinmysoul and I are internet kindred spirits and she is super quality.
velocipedestrienne is the highest quality, like a beautiful diamond. Except diamonds are kind of bullshit, and she is the light of my life.
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treesahquiche replied to your post: My favorite* thing to do is arguing with guys who…
Saw the Facebook thread. Splitting hairs is ridic. Goal: productive, motivated members of society. Fact: society ain’t gonna change. Solution: people who have a hard time need to get by/better, any way they can, with therapy, lifestyle changes, and meds.
I want to time-travel back about half an hour and...
My favorite* thing to do is arguing with guys who have a boner for neuroscience and whatever the opposite of a boner is for psych. IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE EITHER/OR. WE CAN USE MULTIPLE SYSTEMS TO DIAGNOSE AND TREAT MENTAL ILLNESS.
*least favorite
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babybathickey replied to your post: I want to recommend The Particular Sadness of…
THAT IS A WEIRD-ASS BOOK and it made me angry but that’s because I have anorexia and I tend to not like books about food but I’m glad you like it
Yeah, I don’t know how much I would’ve liked it if I’d read it in high school, when I was in the worst part of my eating disorder. I have a...
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kshieldsy replied to your post: This morning I sat on the floor of my parents’…
What a lady, that Linda. I’ve never thought about people loving the church more than God, but that explanation makes so much sense to me. Sidenote: If I had to become a rogue Christian, I would definitely go Quaker.
I like the Quakers! I think I’d probably go Lutheran. Orthodox church music is my favorite,...
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motivatedslacker replied to your post: This morning I sat on the floor of my parents’…
Your mom is amazing, and so are you. <3
cunt—goddess replied to your post: This morning I sat on the floor of my parents’…
i love your mom so much.
She is the best possible mother. While I was cleaning my room this afternoon, I was playing Brahms’s Piano Concerto No. 1, and she...
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I want to recommend The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake to you all, but I’m going to have to stop sobbing first.
This morning I sat on the floor of my parents’ bedroom while my mother was drying her hair and we talked about religion and politics. We both did a little dance for Delaware. We both scowled at Bishop Moriak. We talked about the Church and the queer community.
My mother said, “If the Church ever took an open stance against the LGBT community, I would leave. I would be a rogue...
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“Nina. Sweetheart. When do I ever…oh, never mind. I make fun of you pretty...”
– Texts from J.
shesarejector:
thehobodad:
For as much as they tell you about Stop Drop and Roll as a kid, I really expected to be on fire more times in my life.
You mean it wasn’t just that I never had to because my dad was a firefighter so I had special fireproof privileges?
CHECK YOUR FIREPROOF PRIVILEGE.
Sometimes you find yourself free-handing a Cheburashka drawing for your mother’s birthday while wearing a Pittsburgh Quidditch t-shirt and eating Frosted Mini Wheats from an old margarine container. I mean, I’m assuming you do. I wouldn’t know anything about it.
rnackenzie:
remember when my cat helped make pizza
thehobodad:
For as much as they tell you about Stop Drop and Roll as a kid, I really expected to be on fire more times in my life.
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“I will concede the following points that every comedian wants us all so badly to...”
– Curtis Luciani, In Reponse to Daniel Tosh’s Rape Joke (via misandry-mermaid)
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“I go into the mill. What is a water mill? Describe.”
“Describe the forest.”...”
– Some entries in Isaac Babel’s diaries, as listed in Elif Batuman’s memoir of reading Russian books, The Posessed. (via itgivesitthew)
The entire book is highly recommended, by the way.
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fromthefloatingworld replied to your post: I watched My Cousin Vinny for the first time today…
I LOVE THAT SILLY MOVIE AND MARISA TOMEI IS HOT IN ALL HER SILLY 80S OUTFITS
I AGREE IN ALL CAPS.
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I watched My Cousin Vinny for the first time today (gift of the Pascha Bunny) and and and Marisa Tomei. Marisa TOMEI.
Also, that is a damn fine movie.
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thegutlesswonder:
a bdsm themed sandwich shop called Dom’s Subs
perfectioninimperfection:
I do not spew profanities. I enunciate them clearly, like a fucking lady.
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mariaaugustak replied to your post: So as of today J knows about all my mental stuff,…
Scary of course, but so, so good. If I can share, when I finally told the now Mr. about my problems, expecting him to cut and run, he told me he was in awe of the person I am with all I’ve had to deal with. Being open is the key to owning who you are
Aw, I like the Mr. a lot.
Thanks for sharing this.
whimsicottonees:
so i was cleaning up my folders on my computer when i came across this
i was really intrigued, i didn’t know what it was, I was so excited and I couldn’t remember making it, so I opened it and this is what I found
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